Get with the program

With my wedding being in August and it being so hot and humid that time of year, I decided if I was going to do programs they would double as fans. The cardstock was printed out, ribbon was purchased, and they were all ready to assemble...until I realized my mother, love her heart, had not only misspelled one of the groomsmen's last names, but assigned him an entirely new last name. This posed a problem as we didn't want to offend anyone by actually distributing them and letting people see the error so that labor of love went into the recycling bin and we nixed the idea of programs altogether (or so I thought). I figured it was one less DIY project we would have on our plate but for some odd reason my mom thinks that programs are completely necessary, so here is a picture of the very basic programs we decided on to appease her needs for having some information on a piece of paper. They're tri-fold so they fit a lot of print and they match the invitations quite well and will get the job done of telling the who's and what's of the wedding day.

Little accomplishments

I've felt a little bit of wedding burnout here lately and have been slacking on getting stuff done that needs to get done here in the next 26 days. Just thinking that I only have that much time to get all the stuff on my to-do list done makes me want to throw up. Seriously. But I got a few little things accomplished over the holiday weekend so I would have something to post here to make me feel a little better about my procrastinating self. Got our little hanging monogram finished that's going to be put on the front door of the venue, spruced up my pitiful looking table numbers, got the bubbles all finished and put into their basket which my mother and I made all pretty with some strategically placed ribbon, ordered part of our parent's gifts, and made an appointment to get my bustle done. Still have a whole sheet of college-ruled paper filled up with things that need to be addressed but at least I've made some progress. Here are some pics of the DIY stuff:

Vendor Reviews

I think I've worked with my vendors enough now to properly rate them so long as they don't royally screw up sometime between now and the wedding; God forbid on the day of my wedding. I am not a Bridezilla by nature at all, but if someone we are paying fails to live up to the very reasonable and contracted standards agreed upon, I will straight roundhouse kick someone in the face...or at least not tip them :) So here are the reviews for practically everyone I have worked with thus far.
Engagement ring & bride's wedding band: Marks & Morgan Jewelers
B FI and I went ring shopping together so he could get some ideas for what I liked, but ultimately the decision was left up to him. He did a great job and my perfect rings ended up being at Marks & Morgan. I have no negative remarks against Marks & Morgan as far as customer service and selection. My only "beef" with them is that you have to get your rings inspected every 6 months for as long as you have them and if you forget to do it even one time the insurance you paid for is voided. It's not a huge deal, but it is slightly annoying considering many places we visited did not require routine inspections and if I still lived in my small hometown the nearest Marks & Morgan I would have to visit every 6 months would be almost 2 hours away.
Groom's wedding band: Titaniumkay.com
A Let me first say I was very hesitant to order a ring online, but FI did not find anything he liked in any stores we visited and when he stumbled across the Titanium Kay site he found one he had to have. The fine people at Titanium Kay put me at ease with their 30 day no-questions-asked return policy and reviews from real people who had ordered the product already. The ring was delivered promptly and it's more durable and better quality than a lot of rings we looked at in jewelry stores. It was also half the price!

Monogram Key Fobs for Bridesmaids Gifts: Mylittlecuddlebugs.com

A- Shipping was a bit slow through this site, but they have a wonderful selection of products and lots of different colors and fabrics to choose from so I was able to make each gift unique to the girl I'm giving it to. The key fobs I received were of such great quality that I had to order me one as well!

Cufflinks for Groomsmen Gifts: Cuff-daddy.com

A This website has a great variety of cufflinks from the classic to just plain fun if you are searching for some for the men in the wedding party. Their pricing is some of the cheapest we found and they offer bulk discounts if you are ordering more than 5 pairs of cufflinks. Overall I highly recommend Cuff-Daddy.
Silk Rose Petals: Petalgarden.com
A This site has great deals on bulk rose petals and even though we ordered the silk ones they are pretty realistic looking thanks to the material they use. If you're not into silk they sell freeze dried rose petals as well and offer free color samples of each to take the guesswork out of picking the right color based on the images on your computer monitor.
Wedding Cake: The City Bakery
A+ Sarah is the pastry chef at The City Bakery who will be making our cake. She is so sweet and absolutely loves her job, which is obvious when looking at her work. We are getting 3 cakes with her-a 3 tiered wedding cake, a groom's cake, and a mini version of our wedding cake made for our first anniversary-all for $400. The bakery will also be providing fresh artisan bread for our reception dinner.
DJ: Mr. C's Mobile Disk Jockey
A FI and I are getting married in a town that's over an hour from where we live and it's hard to make appointments with vendors and get away together with both of our schedules being so different. When we made the trip to Asheville to meet with our DJ for the first time there had been a bad storm and power was out all over town. Our DJ knew we had taken time off work and driven to meet him so instead of canceling he lit some candles and went on with the consultation as planned! How's that for customer service?
Bride and Bridesmaid Attire: David's Bridal
C I have mixed emotions about my experience at David's. On the one hand I found my wedding dress there with the help of one of the consultants who was super friendly. I never would have given a second glance at the dress I ended up buying if it weren't for her convincing me to give it a try since it is nothing like what I thought I would get. Getting the bridesmaids dresses at such a big discount was a plus too. The alterations department, however, was a pain to work with. They were very short with me when I asked questions and at times just blatantly rude. On one occasion they scheduled my fitting for the wrong day and then proceeded to make comments about me showing up "late" the entire time. Their horrible service really left a bad taste in my mouth, therefore David's gets a C.

Bridal Shoes: Onlinebridalstore.com

A I only ordered my shoes from onlinebridalstore.com, but they have alot of other bridal accessories for sale as well. They offered free shipping, I got my order super fast, and I found the heels I had been wanting for less than I found at other websites I'd scoped out.

Groom and Groomsmen Attire: Mitchell's Tuxedos

A Mitchell's is a family-owned business and we can really tell a difference between the attention we get there and the attention we got at other places we browsed. I originally urged FI to get the tuxes from Men's Warehouse (the male equivalent to David's Bridal) to be sure the vests would match the girl's dresses, but when we went there they had one option in the watermelon color; a paisley vest with striped tie. We were not digging it at all so we took a color swatch to Mitchell's and since they have such a wide selection they found some other options that match just fine. And FI still scored a free tux.

Flowers: The Enchanted Florist

A Janet from The Enchanted Florist is taking care of all things floral for the wedding and it has been a pleasure to work with her. She has been in the business for over 30 years so we're very confident in her skills, and she has been so helpful at keeping us within our budget since we went into this planning process having no clue that flowers were so expensive!

Ceremony and Reception Venue: Homewood Castle

B+ Our venue is absolutely gorgeous. I had actually passed by Homewood a few times and made comments on how pretty it was without knowing it was an event center. Through a series of occurences that left us without a venue, we checked with Homewood about pricing thinking it would be way out of our range. The staff helped us find ways to afford the dream wedding we had envisioned without spending a fortune. My only issue has been that as a bride who lives out of town from where my wedding is located I rely solely on email for correspondence, and sometimes the fine folks at Homewood are pretty slow to respond.
Caterer: Artisan Catering
A+ The staff at Artisan has been so great. My emails are always answered promptly and they practically trip over themselves to make sure me and FI's wedding day goes the way we want it to. The chef there even agreed to replicate a favorite recipe I had that was not even close to anything he had on his menu at my request, and might I add he did an amazing job. I would recommend them to everyone in the Asheville area looking for a caterer.

Photographer: Alisha Silver

A Alisha has some of the most affordable prices in the Asheville area, but when I looked at her pictures online I thought the pricing was a mistake. She has a background in graphic design and takes a really photojournalistic approach to photography and her shots are so good. She has agreed to do a complimentary TTD session after our wedding too so she definitely deserves a high grade!

Officiant: Jeff King

A+ I guess he is not really considered a "vendor" since he isn't the kind of minister you hire through the yellow pages, but either way I feel like I need to list him here just so I can give him an A+. My aunt actually referred us to Jeff. She knew him from her church and since we aren't members at any certain church and were looking for someone to perform our ceremony, we were very grateful when he agreed to drive all the way to our wedding site to marry us. We had never met prior to the first consultation we had but by the end of that meeting FI and I felt so comfortable with Jeff. He gave us complete freedom with the ceremony as well and we really appreciated that since it was important to us that the ceremony be personal.

Online RSVP is a Godsend

I know that people have varied opinions on having guests RSVP on the internet vs. through the mail, but let me just say that the time-saving tool that is the online RSVP has been amazingly awesome. When guests respond, I get an email sent to me and it keeps me constantly updated on the head count for our caterer. Guests also enter their email addresses so if FI and I have any questions (or need to tell them that extra "and guest" they added is NOT coming to our wedding) we can correspond easily. People really have no excuse not to RSVP now since most of them use the internet daily anyway, and the best news is no worrying about response cards getting lost in the mail! Hooray for technology!

My favorite part

I must say my favorite part of this whole planning process thus far has been writing our own ceremony. FI and I got the green light from our minister to customize the ceremony to our liking, so we just ran with it. Every aspect is just so "us." We already knew we were writing our own vows, but being able to have free reign to personalize all the rest of it is just great! We are so glad our officiant is so flexible :) Here's our ceremony as it will be taking place on the big day...

Our Wedding Ceremony

*Grandmothers, mothers, and bridal party enter to “Heavenly Day”

*Bride enters to “Hear You Me” (Mothers will light taper unity candles before bride processional)

Minister: It is with great pleasure that we gather today to witness the joining of two hands and two hearts in holy matrimony. These two people, Cortneyloo and R, have fallen in love so deeply, so completely, that today, they make a bond, a sacred covenant before God, whereby their hearts, their bodies, and their souls shall be united as one in marriage for the rest of their days.

Who blesses the marriage of this woman to this man?

Bride’s parents: We do.

Minister: And who blesses the marriage of this man to this woman?

Groom’s parents: We do.

(Bride will present her mother with rose at this time and parents will take their seats)

Minister: Cortneyloo and R, look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to each other – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same. For after today you shall say to the world –This is my husband. This is my wife.

The bible teaches us that love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast. It is not proud, it is not rude. It is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.

Please take each other’s hands, so that you may see the gift they are to you.

(Pause for bride to hand bouquet to Maid of Honor and take Groom’s hands)

These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow, and forever.

These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future.

These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other.

These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind.

These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and as in today, tears of joy.

These are the hands that will give you strength and support when you need it.

And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.

At this time, the couple has chosen to recite their own vows.

R: Cortney, you are my best friend, my soul mate; the one I am meant to be with for the rest of my life. I have practically grown up with you, and now I want nothing more than to grow old with you. I feel so blessed that God has put you in my life, and standing up here with you today I feel an overwhelming sense of joy. I love everything about you, like the way you laugh so hard at things that you make no sound or how you beg me to bring home every stray animal you come across because you have such a big heart. I love you not only for the person you are, but for the person I am because of you. I promise here and now in the presence of God and the people we love to always be faithful to you, to be patient with you-even when you make me stay up until one in the morning to get the Christmas tree decorated “just right”, to be honest with you, and most of all I promise to always love you the only way that I know how; completely, sincerely, and more each day than the last.

Cortney: R, you are my best friend, my soul mate; the one I am meant to be with for the rest of my life. I have practically grown up with you, and now I want nothing more than to grow old with you. I feel so blessed that God has put you in my life, and standing up here with you today I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I love everything about you, especially how you have a special structured way of tucking me in at night or how you find crazy ways to show your love for me like singing “happy birthday” to me in a crowded grocery store over the loudspeaker. I love you not only for the person you are, but for the person I am because of you. I promise here and now in the presence of God and the people we love to always be faithful to you, to be honest with you-even if that means telling you how much I spent on getting ready today, to be patient with you, and most of all I promise to always love you the only way that I know how; completely, sincerely, and more each day than the last.

Minister: Cortneyloo, having heard these words of devotion that R has spoken to you, do you take him to be your husband, to live together in the covenant of marriage? Do you promise to love him, comfort him, honor and cherish him, for better or for worse as long as you both shall live?

Cortney: I do.

Minister: R, having heard these words of devotion that Cortneyloo has spoken to you, do you take her to be your wife, to live together in the covenant of marriage? Do you promise to love her, comfort her, honor and cherish her, for better or for worse as long as you both shall live?

R: I do.

Minister: May we have the rings?

(Maid of honor and best man will hand over rings)

Cortney will you place the ring on R’s finger and repeat after me: With this ring, I thee wed. And with all that I am and all that I have, I pledge my love to you now and forever.

R will you place the ring on Cortney’s finger and repeat after me: With this ring, I thee wed. And with all that I am and all that I have, I pledge my love to you now and forever.

(Minister will hold up engagement ring before reading next part and then hand it to groom.)

The engagement ring is a symbol of promise and intention. Now the intention is realized and the promise fulfilled. Please place the engagement ring on Cortney’s finger over the wedding band to symbolize that the love that brought you together will always protect and sustain your marriage.

Now the couple will commemorate their marriage by lighting a Unity Candle.

(Bride and groom will walk over to the candles)

Cortneyloo and R, the two distinct candle flames represent your lives before this day, individual, unique and special. Please take the candle symbolizing your life before today, and together light the center candle to symbolize the union of your individual lives. As this new flame burns undivided, so shall your lives now be one. From now on your thoughts will always be for each other rather than just your individual selves. Your plans and goals will be mutual, your joys and sorrows both will be shared alike.

Although you are now entering into marriage, that does not mean you lose your personal identity. Rather, you will both use your individuality to create and strengthen the relationship of marriage. Therefore all three candles remain glowing. The individual candles represent all that makes each of you the wonderful and unique person the other admires and respects. The Unity candle in the center symbolizes the union of your lives and your families as well as your shining commitment to each other, and to a lasting and loving marriage.

(Bride and groom will at this time walk back to minister)

Cortneyloo and R, you have affirmed your love and loyalty to each other through your vows and the giving and receiving of rings in front of your family, friends, and God himself. Because you have shown your willingness to share life together, it is my privilege to pronounce you man and wife. R, you may now kiss your bride.

*”Warning Sign” will begin playing

Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great joy and pleasure to present to you for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. E!

(Bride will present groom’s mother with rose before walking back up the aisle)

Something special

You know how you have the whole "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue" that you have to incorporate into your attire on the wedding day? Well the picture above is technically my "borrowed" items even though I'm not wearing them like the usual tradition requires. Really I would just classify them as "something special." Our wedding has plenty of non-traditional components, but I'm glad to be able to keep with family tradition and use the cake serving set my grandma has kept all through the years as well as the toasting glasses my parents and all of my aunts and uncles on my mom's side have used in their weddings. Don't you love how they are set up all runway style in front of the pink background? haha Hopefully one day FI and I will have a child of our own that can use these heirlooms in their wedding too. Now that would be really special.

Please feed the vendors

In talking with our photographer the other day I learned that oftentimes when she is working weddings she goes hours without food. Why is this? Because in their blissful planning, the bride and groom usually forget to have a meal prepared for her. Now this is a person who is arriving to meet with us at 1:00 and will be at our wedding until we leave around 8:30 or 9:00. That is a long time to be going without a meal. She said she once even had to take a short break from photographing a reception and get some juice because her blood sugar was getting so low that she was dizzy. I think there is a lesson to be learned here, ladies. FEED YOUR VENDORS. They are going to be spending so much time making your day all that you dreamed of so the least you can do is give them some grub. You don't even necessarily have to provide the same meal your guests are eating if expense is an issue, so long as they have something to munch on during the day. I found out many caterers have separate sandwich dishes they will prepare especially for this purpose. We will be feeding our photographer along with our DJ since they are going to be spending most of their day with us. It's not only a nice gesture, but a guarantee of good work. Because really who performs well on an empty stomach?